Crumpled bodies. Shattered lives. A distraught and grieving state. We Coloradans are still groping for answers to the "why" of Columbine High's tragedy. I don't have the answers, but maybe we, together, can begin to figure out how we change our society, and our behavior, so that this horrifying drama is not repeated.

We humans seem to have a penchant for brutality. Look at Hitler or Kosovo or Ruanda or our own destruction of Native Americans during the settling of the West. I remember reading a book called African Genesis many years ago. The author traced the evolution of brutality back to the earliest animals. It is part of our heredity, he claimed. And, looking at human history, there's a lot of evidence that he may be right.

But, hate isn't inherited. Hate is felt. And hate is taught. Do you remember the words of a song from the movie, "South Pacific," that said, "You've got to be taught to hate and fear. . . .to hate all the people your relatives hate"? Well, isn't it time to stop teaching our children to hate and fear people who look or believe differently from us? Isn't it time to teach our children to treat one another with civility and respect?

Where do we start to deal with the events of two weeks ago? Banning trench coats isn't the answer. Banning abusive treatment of students by other students is part of the answer. Schools can set behavior standards for students and faculty. They should not tolerate bullying by anyone. Cliques and groups are natural-we adults form them, too. But groups should not be allowed to behave in ways that hurt outsiders, or anyone else. Schools should be places where tolerance and respect for others is expected and required, not places where some students feel threatened or scared or cast out. Our society has room for many different ideas, attitudes and activities. Schools should promote appreciation for the diversity that is a hallmark of American society.

Parents have the biggest responsibility in teaching their children civil and respectful behavior. What do kids learn when their parents, full of road rage, flip the bird at an offending car or when their parents look down on someone who doesn't belong to their country club or church? I think it's way too late to be calling for parent accountability after two suicidal teenagers murder and maim their schoolmates. Accountability starts much earlier. We parents need to be held accountable by society for teaching our kids values, civility and respect for others. We need to be held accountable for making sure they have a safe, secure and loving home where, if they're feeling enraged or alienated, they can let down and learn to handle their strong feelings. And, we need to provide struggling parents and families the help they need to do this.

I'm not ready to blame Klebold and Harris' parents for their children's murderous rampage. I know how hard it is to see your child troubled and how easy it is to hope for the best because you don't know what else to do. Our overburdened mental health and child welfare systems don't have the resources to help every angry teenager and worried family. School counselors can't possibly provide adequate guidance to the hundreds of students they're assigned to help. If we citizens aren't willing to invest in our schools, our kids and our families so that children get the help they need, then we, too are responsible.

Finally, our society is inundated with guns. I'm sick of the bumper sticker that says "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." If those two enraged young men at Columbine had had only fists for taking out their hate, they would have bloodied noses and blackened eyes, but not murdered and maimed their schoolmates. So, I believe we should also hold our lawmakers accountable when they vote to open up the gun markets. And we should hold accountable those gun manufacturers who flood our streets with guns, many of which aren't for sport; they're just made to kill people.

There are no simple answers. But, I think we all know-if we don't change our attitudes and behavior, if we don't to treat one another with respect, we will once again wonder how we could have failed so miserably the next time a Columbine High rampage happens.